Dear Emma,
Sorry it took so long to get back to you. Now for the feedback to your short......
Overall I like the idea of the story. I like the "hunter becomes the hunted" theme and thought that you told the story as best as you can with the boards that you drew. Here's my recommendations on how you can best improve your work:
BOARDS:
1. Drawing - although boards tend to be rough, there is a certain line quality and level of drafting that is expected. Basically what you see on most "art of" feature animation books is what you should shoot for as far as quality of drawing.
2. Staging/Framing/Compositions - Some of your shots are decent but overall I am missing some dynamic cutting and framing as well as use of creative staging.
3. Acting / character development - I'd like to see you come up with designs that are really appealing and pushed. Consequently I feel that your contrasts in acting can be pushed further as well.
ANIMATIC:
I felt that the timing is very even and quite sluggish overall. The animatic or reel is your chance to simulate movement and animation so use it your advantage. Learn better timing and spacing and plan your shots more carefully.
OVERALL:
Improve your drawing and film making and your boards will improve concurrently. Remember that you are the film maker which means you are the director of your own movie. Therefore you have the responsibility of holding the audiences interest and you should do everything in your power to make your story the best as it can be.
I hope this helps. Take care and much luck.
Best regards,
Louie
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Email: emmawyton@hotmail.com
The visitor commented:
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Subject: Feedback on animatic
Hey Louie!
I just want to start by saying congratulations on all the fantastic work you've done! I am immensely inspired by your success and have really enjoyed looking at your work and watching your interview on CGMW. I am a huge fan of Dreamworks, and had a riot seeing Megamind recently
I have been working on my storyboarding and animatic skills lately at Ravensbourne College in England, and recently completed an animatic for a pitch.
I was wondering whether you could give me a little feedback on how I can improve. Would that be okay? I understand you are busy with the recent film "Rise of the Guardians", but if you do have a spare moment, I would greatly appreciate it!Here's a link to the vid. My friend helped me upload it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7qIApav73IThank you very much!
I look forward to hearing from you
Emma Wyton
All in all, extremely positive, though it definitely highlights areas of my work that needs editing, to help perfect it.
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